A little while ago, I went through a period where almost any time I had a positive thought, or a feeling of joy bubble up, I would quash it

(And if you want the official definition of quash, it’s ‘reject as invalid; put an end to; suppress’ – ha!)

It started to make me feel quite sad; that I wasn’t allowing myself to feel my own joy. Joy that I’d obviously leaned into, allowed, and received on some level; joy that I was worthy of enjoying.

I would walk through my days on eggshells, wondering when/if/how/why my joy would drop away, leaving my stomach lurching, my mind racing, and my heart hurting.

And then one day, I decided to do things differently.

Every time a negative thought surfaced, I simply said in reply: I’m allowed my joy.

Every time a self-sabotaging tonight surfaced, I simply said in reply: I’m allowed my joy. 

Every time my mind threatened to take my joy away (through fears or doubt or insecurities), I simply said in reply: I’m allowed my joy.

Did the negative thoughts completely cease? Not completely, not all at once, but they lost their power, which meant they lost their grip, which meant they lost their pattern of momentum and frequency, and slowly, they ceased to upset me.

Because I’m allowed my joy.

And so are you.

You’re allowed your joy.

You’re allowed your joy.

You’re allowed your joy. 

Love,