How to let yourself try again

Sometimes things don’t go to ‘plan’ do they?

And that old chestnut, once said by Benjamin Franklin, ‘Fail to plan, and you’re planning to fail’, can just add more weight to an already heavy heart (and says nothing about self-forgiveness, trusting where you are, or the timing of your life).

But trying again—to bring forth whatever it is you want to create or receive—is so very possible for you.

And not only that, trying again might uncover everything you need to know about why it didn’t happen before, in the way your mind had decided it must.

Here are some questions you might like to ask yourself, the next time you feel too overwhelmed, tired, drained or emotional to try again:

Firstly, write out what you’re working towards, or what you feel resistant to trying again.

Now, answer the following prompts, in relation to your goal:

  • Where are you not backing yourself?
  • Why are you not backing yourself?
  • What fears come up when you think about trying again, or what is creating the most resistance or tension for you, in relation to trying again?
  • What would feel different if you tried again, without feeling too attached to the outcome? And what would be your first steps to doing so?
  • Where can you ask for, or lean into, more support to help you try again?
  • What are the benefits of this goal coming true for you, and what do these benefits bring up for you? (E.g. sometimes we say we’re scared to fail, but we’re really scared of what the ‘success’ will bring with it.)
  • What do you think you ‘need more of’ in order for this goal to come true, and how can you bring attention to where you might already have ‘enough’ of this for now?
  • Do you think you need to know more or have improved yourself in any way, in order for this goal to come true?
  • If you answered yes to the above question, what would change if you believed you’re already enough, worthy and able to receive while being exactly who you are? How would you act?
  • How can you allow yourself to sit in the space of being, of trusting in this pause, this space in between, and finding joy here? (Yes, it’s possible to feel joy after things don’t go to plan!)
  • And finally, how can you rest, restore, replenish and nourish yourself and your energy before trying again? (If indeed, you decide to.)

Let yourself write your answers in a free-flowing way, without judging or censoring yourself. Once you’ve done so, sit with yourself, honouring everything that came up and through for you.

I know that trying again when things haven’t gone to plan can seem really hard, but I also know you can not only do hard things, but change what feels hard into what helps you create more ease, flow and momentum.

I know you can pick yourself up, and rather than simply dusting yourself off, do the inner work needed to come back to yourself, your power and your path.

You can forgive yourself, you can view your past actions through the lens of compassion, and you can connect with your personal power, allowing you to respond to life with self-empathy, expansion and a nod to your constant evolution.

You are not done yet.

So, will you give yourself another chance?

I know what I’d do.

(I’d say do it.)




I’m Cassie Mendoza-Jones

My work is for you if you’re ready to change your beliefs about what’s possible for you.

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