How many times throughout the day do you think you could be doing more?
How many times throughout the day do you think you should be doing something better?
How many times a day do you give yourself a hard time over… absolutely everything, yet nothing in particular?
And, last question; how exhausting is it?
It’s very exhausting.
It’s also usually a waste of (exhausting) energy. It’s a waste of (exhausting) energy because you’re putting so much intention and time and thought into something that you don’t want, something that isn’t lighting you up, something that isn’t helping you feel nurtured and supported, connected and inspired, peaceful and positive.
Your constant worrying of what you’re not doing, your incessant inner dialogue about how much more you could and should and would be doing (if this was different, or one day when…) doesn’t feel inspiring, or uplifting, or empowering, because it isn’t. That inner talk isn’t true, and it’s not real. It’s fear, it’s ego, it’s panic and pain. It’s the part of you craving to be seen, to be recognised, to be validated.
It’s the part of all of us craving to be seen, to be recognised, to be validated.
That is real. We all want to be seen. We all want to be witnessed, and to bear witness. We all want to be validated. But trying to do that by being harsh on yourself, by telling yourself you’re further away from where you want to be than ever before, that doesn’t help. Does it?
Putting yourself down at every chance you get doesn’t draw you closer to what you want to create in your life, nor does it draw what you want to create in your life closer to you.
So whether it’s your own inner ‘faultfinder’ that’s actually faulty in itself (Um, how do I turn this thing off?) or there’s someone else in your life who’s leaving hints at what else you could be doing, say Thanks for sharing! And get on what feels good to you, in this moment, now, today.
Do it without thinking about things that are so far away that they haven’t even seen the light of day yet.
Do it without wondering about the possibilities of what you’re not doing.
Do it without giving yourself a hard time for trying your absolute best.
I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. I truly believe most of us are always trying our best. So, believe this about yourself too. Try it on for size.
How does it feel? How does it feel to whisper a different kind of truth to yourself? A truth that says Yes, yes I am trying my best. My best is good enough. If I could be doing more, I would be. If I could be doing something differently, I’m open to trying it, but I won’t undervalue what I’ve already done, or who I already am.
Start believing in yourself. Start trusting yourself. Start giving yourself the benefit of the doubt, and believing deeply—on every level—that you are doing your best.
If you could be doing more, you would be.
But you’re doing what you’re doing, and that is enough.